Rude Facts


Gawkers, voyeurs and righteously indignant moralists will find references at the reading list page. The CDC maintains a list of annual US suicide statistics. It remains unchanged despite all manner of suicide prevention programs and cruel false hope hotlines.

The work of Kipling Williams lately of Purdue University on ostracism may also be useful.

There are no suicide/crisis hotline numbers here because they are not only ineffective, but their use of deceit and dishonesty in the use of police and the forced loss of individuals’ civil rights in the absence of any evidence-based effective help for people suffering unbearable pain is unethical, ineffective (the biggest risk for suicide is a previous attempt) and cruel false hope snake oil substituted for effective evidence-based compassionate care.

Moreover, emergency department personnel have no specific interest, education or expertise in addressing suicidality.

The detective asked the man’s story, what brought him out here, and a dialogue began. The man, in his early 20s, explained that he had no job and no place to live, Detective Keszthelyi said.

“You might seem like you are alone, but you are not really alone,” he told him.

Lots of people lose jobs — and find others they like better, he said.

“You just have to find something in life that you enjoy doing, and when you find that special thing in life, you are going to be successful at it,” Detective Keszthelyi assured him.

The man wanted to know what would happen if he came down. The officers know to be truthful. “In my experience, you don’t want to lie to somebody like that,” Detective Keszthelyi said.

The detective told him that he would be escorted into an ambulance and taken to a hospital, where he would be evaluated and assigned a social worker and therapist.

As opposed to the NYT police interviewee who told a suicidal sufferer a standard whopper that he would be assigned a social worker and a therapist at a hospital, that’s an outright lie. Emergency department staff, like the NYT’s wet dream of its description of the ESU, are all about being adrenaline junkies. These folks live for trauma, clinical instability and quick resuscitation efforts along with races to the OR. They largely resent people who are suicidal and in distress, and they very often are sadistic and cruel toward them. In any ED, there are physicians and nurses who brag about the cruelty they reserve for suicidal patients – unlubed large bore nasogastric tubes, extra doses of activated charcoal, strip searches, ridicule, unnecessary urinary catheterizations, “misses” in IV starts, unnecessary use of restraints and seclusion as punishment and retaliation and on and on and on. Psychiatrists have the absurd notion that patients’ experiences must make them want to avoid remaining (malingering in their parlance) in the hospital – the psychiatrists delusionally viewing the prison like atmosphere as hotel-like.

Almost 100% of people seen in EDs for suicidality, suicide attempts and suicide ideation not only do not receive those resources, but they receive no followup care or contact at all.  They are left to their own devices to relieve their unbearable suffering after learning that “care” is based on dishonesty, deceit, coercion, humiliation and the loss of basic civil rights and dignity. That “therapeutic alliance” invoked by mental health providers is not based on a single ethical principle, and it’s aim is only at compliance. Trust is used to sucker in victims.

As a humane, painless death is not available to them, they are forced to turn to methods which entail self harm and violence. Companion animal end of life ethics are by far more advanced in the US than is terminal psychic suffering.

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4 thoughts on “Rude Facts

  1. Aek,
    Your forthright assessment about the crisis hotlines is appreciated. I called one in 2007 (?), only to be told I was “catastrophizing”. That was before Bankruptcy, litigation in two states (to defend myself & survive), losing my house, losing ability to exercise parenting time (lack of financial ability), homelessness, chronic health issues.
    Do you see any sign that someone is starting to pull the blinders off to actually look? Even with what I’ve found on ostracism; it seems focused on the superfluous issue of “self-esteem” – nothing on the loss of sane, rational, human connection – something with even an ounce of dignity. It all feels like some perverse form of “Gaslighting” by people in denial of basic facts.
    How do those of us marginalized by society survive, even just spiritually?

    • Hi Russ:

      I wish I knew. Your timing is apt – tomorrow I become officially homeless once again from a predatory landlord – illegal apartment, code violations, etc, etc. and no housing at all in any form whatsoever is available to me, nor will it be.

      This is a zero quality of life – a living death. I only want it to cease. And I believe that when society creates this hell, it should then recognize the victim’s right to humanely affect a peaceful, painless and timely death.

  2. aek. i hope you have found a place to stay. I am sorry for your continued struggles. i am still here – not gawking or whatever, just still here.

  3. Aek, hope you’ve found some place adequate, or found even an ounce of peace. If there’s any chance you’re open to dialog (?), I’d appreciate it. Could really use contact with another soul capable of acceptance, rather than labeling. If there is anything I can offer in return, will gladly do what I can. Thought of you often, & hope something has changed for the better for you, even if just to see hope in someone else’s struggle.

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